Better Than Me
by Slashypotterness
Summary: Before Regulus goes off to the cave he has one last conversation with his brother. The idea has clearly been done before but I think my Regulus is slightly different. It's written in third person but from Regulus POV.


**IMPORTANT: Please note that I now have a point system where you can get freebies from reading and reviewing my fics. Please look at my profile or the end of this fanfic for more information! **

**Authors Note: Not much to say about this story. It's a one shot from Regulus's POV, pretty self explanatory. Implied character death obviously. It is also NOT been through a Beta Reader, if anyone wants to offer their services that would be GREAT!**

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_Those who bore the name Black knew from the time they were born they were expected to conduct themselves based on a certain code of conduct. This code of conduct was not there for them to agree with or understand, but for them to follow without question or hesitation. This code, just like their family motto Toujours pur, was ingrained in the minds of all members of the Black line and if it wasn't it would be beat into them until it stuck. Of course, despite their strive for perfection, they were still a family and did not wish to place undue pressure on their children. This is why each Black got about a three-year leeway period before there responsibilities really set it. Of course that's all they needed; once you could talk, walk and properly take yourself to the loo there was really no reason to conduct yourself in other manner than perfect. _

_This code of conduct had kept the House of Black the noblest line of purebloods for last several centuries. It was an honor to be born Black, one that none of the bloodline ever dared take for granted. It was only in the last couple of decades that the purity of their most noble house had been infiltrated. It was the fault of the lofty ministry and their new tolerance for muggles and mudbloods alike. It was the fault of Hogwarts and people like Albus Dumbledore who lead people to believe that muggles were anything but abominations. The weaker members of the Black family were taken in by these ideas and strayed thus losing their spot in the noble and most ancient house of Black. Sirius and Andromeda were just two of the people who allowed themselves to be perverted by false propaganda and muggle tolerance. Their discretions lost them their honorable family and lead them to a life of Blood Traitordism: the fools. _

_Regulus Black though was the reminder that while every tree had it'd flaws, once the rotten branches were broken off and discarded the tree once again returned back to it's elegant and perfect state. Regulus was not just the perfect Black but he was the perfect pureblood. He was the sort that everyone should inspire to be like. He knew this because his mother had told and mother was never wrong, she told him that too. Mother had been so very proud when he lifted his sleeve and showed her the mark. For the first time since his blood traitor brother had abandoned them his mother smiled, she had even kissed him on his forehead and told him that she loved him. It would break her heart if she knew what he was about to do... _

_Regulus reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small, silver and green locket. It was transfigured to the best of his abilities, which arguably weren't very good. Still, in less you were a jeweler or collector it looked authentic enough and the note inside would surly intrigue the Dark Lord more than Regulus's shoddy transfiguration attempt. He smiled bitterly as he ran his thumb over the locket. He couldn't believe he was actually doing this. Out of all the ways he imagined his life turning out, this had not even crossed his mind. His poor mother would be so ashamed if she ever knew. Of course she never would, knowing would not only break her heart but it would also put her in unimaginable danger. _

_His beautiful mother's last memory of him would be the kiss he placed on her cheek this morning as she wished him good luck on the mission she assumed was for the Dark Lord not against him. His father of course would remember the firm handshake Regulus shared with him, one that his father had praised as finally having the confidence of a man not the uncertainty of a boy. Last night he had shared a drink with Malfoy, even letting the blonde brag about his ministry endeavors without rolling his eyes. He had made sure before leaving that he held baby Draco extra tightly, allowing the little boy to pull at his long raven locks to his hearts content until his mother pulled him away. He had given Cissy a nearly bone crushing hug, knowing if anyone in the family had been suspicious it was, she always was the smart one. He had even managed to finally tell Bella how much of a psychopath he thought she was-the curse that followed was worth. _

All Regulus's ends had almost been tied and now there was only one more conversation to be had; one more stray and strangling string to tie up before he meet up with his faithful house elf and journeyed onto the cave. Somehow, it seemed fitting that HE would be the last person to see Regulus alive. It was something about things going full circle he supposed. Laughing slightly at the irony Regulus placed the locket back in his pocket before stepping forward, allowing himself to be seen by a man who hadn't laid eyes on him in over a year.

"Good evening brother mine," Regulus said, a slight smirk forming on his face. "Long time it's been."

Sirius, who had been silently reading the Quibbler while sipping on a glass of Firewhiskey, looked up at the familiar voice. Surprise instantly splashed across his face when he recognized his younger brother. It was odd enough that Regulus would visit a place like Hogehead, such a place being beneath his haughty standards, but the fact that he was addressing his disowned brother was down right suspicious. Instinctively he tightened his grip on his wand, it was no well keep secrete what his brother had become and he didn't for one moment pretend that family bonds, or lack there of, would protect him. Still he found himself vaguely curious to why his brother would be approaching him after all this time.

"How nice to see you Reggie," the old almost forgotten childhood nickname was sarcastically spit off of Sirius's tongue. "Has mother had a change of heart then? Sent you round to collect me in time for my twentieth birthday?"

"Why yes Sirius," Regulus drawled. "I've come on behalf of mother to beg you back because we've all missed you so much. "

_That was a lie of course. The day Sirius left home for good Regulus had let out a deep sigh of relief. It wasn't that he disliked his brother; if he was to be perfectly honest he was rather indifferent to the older Black's presence most of the time. It was the tension that existed in their house that he couldn't take. It was the constant yelling, dish throwing and door slamming that grated on Regulus's every nerve. In all fairness, he couldn't blame all of that on Sirius, even though he tended to anyway. Logic dictated that such disorder and perturbation in one household could not possibly be caused by one person's insolence. It took an equally insolent individual to engage the other in a battle such a battle of will that the whole foundation of Grimmauld place shook under their furry. _

_Whether or not Sirius was willing to admit it or not, he was more like their mother than Regulus could ever hope to be. While their worldviews were clearly on two opposite sides of spectrum, their temperament and inability to step outside their own beliefs were symmetrical. Sometimes he wondered if it was their similarities rather than their differences that made them hate each other so much. It only stood to reason that two people as stubborn and hot headed as his mother and brother would be better fitted for people who wouldn't challenge them. In his mother's case, she found his father who no one really knew what he believed because he spent most of his time sipping whiskey in his office. His brother of course had Potter who might have very well been just as hot headed but seemed to agree with Sirius on just about everything. _

_Then there was Regulus who in many ways was like his father. He didn't like to mess with the status quo because he always assumed it was there for a reason even if he didn't understand what the reason might be. He took great pride in doing exactly what his parents told him to, not because he believed them but because it was not worth not believing them. Life was simply easier when you took care to stay in the background and be noticed as little as possible. Even Sirius, with his great distaste for everything Black seemed to go easier in Regulus. He use to think it was because he was his little brother and he held a soft spot for him, now he realized that more reasonable explanation was that unlike their mother Regulus didn't give Sirius much ammunition. Despite a few sarcastic marks an eye roll Regulus would very rarely go head to head with Sirius, often opting to exit the room and let his brother rage on like a lunatic by himself. _

_Sometimes he did find himself wondering what would happen if he did engage Sirius more. Would their relationship mirror that of Sirius and their mother's or would they find out that they had more in common than anyone would have ever thought? Perhaps Regulus would have been taken in by the charm that everyone in Gryffindor claimed his brother had. Perhaps there would have been two black sheep's in the family; his poor mother would have died in humiliations. Of course none of this scenarios were very likely. Regulus was who Regulus was; quiet, meek and observant, the opposite of his influences because he would have never been able to have a voice loud enough to each over theirs so he didn't waste his time trying. _

"I'm afraid not," Regulus finally said, taking a seat next to the older man. "I'm sure you are quite disappointed. I imagine you'd love the opportunity to tell mother where to...what vulgar dialogue would you chose for such an occasion? Stick it...shove it...perhaps you would just tell her to piss off while flipping her the finger. You always did love making a spectacle of yourself. Sometimes I wonder if you are fighting in this war for the sake of the Muggles you seem to love so much or if you just like being controversial."

Regulus observed his brother for a moment. It had been nearly four years since Regulus taken a good look at the other man. After the older boy had run away Regulus took great care to only steal glances at Sirius in pacing, not wanting to let any of his emotions slip through to Sirius or anyone else who might have been looking. It was perfectly clear that as far as his parents were concerned, Regulus was an only child and in turn he was expected to not acknowledge Sirius as anything but a blood traitor or better still not acknowledge him at all.

"I suppose it's both isn't it?" Regulus supplied, moving his hands from his face and resting it on the table. "Just like mother you are bond by your beliefs and just like her your pride won't allow you to for one moment to question, not for anyone's sake, even your own. At the end of the day at least you can say you are true to yourself. I suppose that's always made you believe your better than me. Perhaps in moments of my own weakness I even found myself wondering if you are better than me."

Regulus leaned over so that his nose was almost touching his older brother's.

"You are not better than me," Regulus said flatly. "Or mother, or the Death Eaters or the Dark Lord himself. All of you each have the pathetic distinction of spending far to much time trying to scrap up some sense in this world that was never created to make sense in the first place. You, Sirius want the glory of helping rid this world of the Dark Forces while the Death Eaters wish to rid the world of the filthy and impurities. At the end of the day you fight for the same thing...the glory, the win. Does that make you a hero or does that make you as self-centered as everyone else? I wonder what one would say about a person who dies for a greater good knowing that there shall be no one to testify about what they died for. They would just be gone, meaningless to everyone; perhaps selfishly hated by those they sacrificed for. Yet they are ok with that, because they are use to it, being meek and silent, fading into the background, being perceived as weak."

Regulus stood up from his seat, his hands pressed lazily against his side.

"I'm not weak," Regulus said firmly. "And while you may never believe it, you're not better than me."

Regulus took one last look at Sirius, his older brother who looked just like him right down his piercing grey eyes. There were no loose ends to be tied because in all honesty the brothers never had a chance to create ties or bonds. They had both in a way been victims to the family and world they were brought up in. Sirius wasn't better than Regulus nor was Regulus better than Sirius. They were just different but perhaps not nearly as different as they had always believed themselves to be. After all, like it or not they were brothers and that made them the same.

"Good Bye brother mine," Regulus said, heading for the door.

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